5 February 1780
My dear Madam,
I am not quite certain whether I have written to you since I heard from you or not, though I am certain I intended it. I have been of late much engaged, the providence of God having brought me into a new scene. In October I accepted the living of St Mary Woolnoth, the church that joins to the Post-Office, but I was not instituted till December. On the 19th of that month I preached my first sermon, then returned for a few weeks to Olney, from whence we are now removed. [1] Mrs Newton who stayed a while behind me returned on Wednesday last. Our parting with a people so well beloved and with whom we were so long connected was painful. Could you imagine a tree endued with sensibility in every fibre, plucked up from the spot where it had been striking and spreading its roots for near sixteen years – such have been my feelings – though a concurrence of circumstances satisfied me I followed the Lord’s call, and several things that had happened at Olney prepared me for it, and in some measure lessened my reluctance to leave a place, where I have often wished and prayed, if it were the Lord’s will I might live and die and be buried.
How different is my present charge from that which I have vacated! Farewell sweet retirement, pleasant walks, the beauties of the meadows and the music of the woods! My parish is the seat of opulence, bustle and vanity. Instead of the happy simplicity of a poor but affectionate people, I am in the midst of that refinement and politeness which disguise the heart, and almost stop up every avenue by which fidelity and plain dealing would enter. At Olney I was as a father in the midst of his family. Here I seem a stranger in a strange land. I have indeed a pretty large connection with serious people in London, which will probably still increase, and a few I find in my own parish. I hope in time to feel myself more at home than I am at present. All places should at my time of life be nearly equal, provided I may enjoy peace of conscience, the light of my Lord’s countenance, and be honoured with some usefulness in his service. My entrance among these great and wise people has been hitherto as peaceful and favourable as could be well expected. And the Lord has afforded me one great mercy in preparing for me the parish clerk whom I found upon the spot, who is a very gracious and very prudent man, much respected by the parishioners and almost as useful to me as a right hand. [2]
We shall be sometime before we are settled, as we have not as yet fixed upon a house. The parsonage house is tenanted by the Post-Office, and indeed taken into it. Which I am not sorry for, as it stands in the closest part of the city and will give us excuse for living in a more airy spot.
Why do I trouble you with these little particulars? I believe it is because I feel I am writing to a friend. By this means likewise I have proceeded farther in filling up the sheet than I might otherwise have done. For I am not at present much on cue for writing. I hope your soul prospers and your faith grows exceedingly. O Madam how happy shall we be in proportion as we can die to self in all its branches, particularly to the desire of having something good in ourselves, to give us a better warrant for believing than we think we can derive merely from the goodness of our Saviour and the grace of his promise. It is a great thing to be willing to be saved freely without money, price, plea, or any qualification, but what arises from our misery, emptiness and unworthiness. I hope the Lord is leading you and me nearer to this point of rest. [3]
I sent you a hymn book some months ago according to your direction, it was not so handsomely bound as I wished and meant, but the best I could just then get at, and I was unwilling to delay lest it should be forgotten. Mrs Newton joins me in affectionate remembrance to yourself and respects to Mr Gardiner.
I am
Your sincere friend and obliged servant
John Newton
London 5 February 1780
No. 2 Church Alley Lothbury
[to]
Mrs Gardiner
Leasingham
near Sleaford
Lincolnshire
[on the back: Published in “L'Observateur Chrétien” Island of Jersey 21 September 1833] [Published as ‘No. 6’, it excludes the last paragraph about the hymn book]]
Endnotes:
|
[1] |
On Christmas Day Newton wrote to Thomas Robinson of Leicester: ‘I was instituted the 6th instant, inducted the 8th, and preached my first sermon on the 19th, from "Speaking the truth in love.''’ Newton returned to Olney on 22 December, leaving permanently for London on 14 January 1780. Polly joined him in London a few weeks later, delayed by packing and the snow. |
|
[2] |
Moy Thomas (c.1751-1809), attorney of Bearbinder Lane, was Newton’s vestry clerk. |
|
[3] |
Isaiah 55:1 Ho, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters, and he that hath no money; come ye, buy, and eat; yea, come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. |
Acknowledgements:
Morgan Museum and Library MA 733.11 |
Print